i’m sorry if this sounds mean, i certainly don’t intend it to be so, but i was flipping through a magazine and i came across a picture of liza minelli and her husband and michael jackson and elizabeth taylor at liza’s wedding, and i couldn’t stop staring.
if you’ve seen this photo you know of what i speak.
it looked like a welcoming party of aliens.
why doesn’t fox do a show ‘when plastic surgery goes wrong’?
sorry, that was mean.
but this picture…it’s honestly one of the most compelling and disconcerting things that i’ve ever laid eyes on.
if i ever get plastic surgery it’s going to involve making me look like a bajoran.
wait, did i just say that?
or maybe like ‘batboy’ from the weekly world news. everyone loves ‘batboy’.
maybe if i get plastic surgery to look like ‘batboy’ people will love me, too…sniff.
no one would ever write:
‘batboy, you can get stomped by ratboy,
you 36 year old winged marsupial you can, etc’
speaking of winged marsupials, i’m back in melbourne.
so that means a quick trip to say hi to the flying foxes.
and then a quick trip to the plastic surgeons where i will complete my transformation.
then you’ll see. you won’t have ole ‘no wing moby’ to kick around anymore.
i believe that the flying foxes are vegans, too.
i will live with them. so you can forward my mail to:
batboy(f.k.a-moby)
a tree
melbourne, australia.
thanks,
moby
p.s-‘f.k.a’ means ‘formerly known as’. remember tafkap?