the first time i ever remember playing a (quasi) musical instrument…when i was 3 years old i was living with my mother in danbury connecticut.
we lived in a weird apartment-house in an old rickety apartment. one day i did something bad, i don’t remember what, and my mother got mad at me and sent me to my room (she didn’t hit me, of course, cos only barbarians and republicans hit their children). i was upset so i went to my room and sat on my bed and cried. but instead of just crying i cried into my kazoo, which has to be the funniest sound ever ever produced by a human being.
so my mom came into my room laughing hysterically and we both laughed and laughed on my bed. so my advice for anyone who’s thinking about crying anytime soon would be to go out and buy (or rent) a kazoo and then cry into the kazoo.
it’s the only sure fire thing that will make you instantly feel better.
moby