a question:
you see a dog walking down the street and the dog has 4 types of fur, curly fur, black straight fur, shaved fur, and white fur. you notice that the dog has a computer attached to his collar, and that he’s dragging this computer alongside of him.
and attached to the computer is a rabbit-hutch, stuffed with old newspapers from the 1930’s. you get up close and you see that the headline from 1932 has to do with your grandparents. so you open the rabbit hutch to remove the newspaper and the dog turns to you and starts to growl. so you growl back
and the dog says ‘wow, for a human that’s a pretty impressive growl’
and you say ‘wow, for a human i’m a pretty impressive growler’
and the dog says, ‘ok, so you understand how we talk to each other,
but can you tell me where i can find a good wholesale outlet for italian marble?’
and you understand in a flash that this is not an ordinary dog, for what sort of ordinary dog would have an interest in wholesale italian marble?
you can accept the computer and the rabbit hutch. but the marble piques your curiosity.
the dog takes the newspaper out of the rabbit hutch and spreads it in front of you. the dog then explains that your grandparents were part of a rosicrucian cult that invented different types of foodstuffs as a part of a great mind-control project.
and you knew this. for you remember your grandfather saying on his deathbed, ‘you know, boy, i invented the hamburger. look what it’s done for our world!’
the dog starts to levitate and you see that the dog has grown smaller.
much smaller.
and the dog is shrinking by the second.
and then the dog is gone. and you wish that you could’ve asked him more about the rosicrucians and other things.
so the question is: how did you know that your grandfather was telling you the truth about this dog?
in other news: isn’t it amazing that inexpensive christmas lights can withstand the elements so well?
moby
