warning, this email contains words that might be offensive to some people.
there, warning over.
i just received a piece of junk email entitled ‘dogs fucking hot young chicks’. it raises a bunch of questions.
question 1-who would want to intentionally look at bestiality? it’s gross. simple as that, it’s just gross. if you are inclined to practice bestiality well, far be it for me to judge, but it is gross.
question 2-why are so many sex euphemisms based upon names for animals?
cock?
pussy?
ass?
chick?
beaver?
bird?
dog?
does a penis look like a rooster?
does a vagina look like a cat?
does a butt look like a donkey?
does a woman look like a bird?
sorry if this is an offensive subject to deal with, but it genuinely makes me curious. who in their right mind would look at a penis and think that it looks like a rooster? maybe these euphemisms are vestigal from a time when people were more inclined towards bestiality. did people practice more bestiality back in the days of chaucer?
i bet they did. so now we’ve given up the bestiality (thank goodness), but we’re stuck with the bestiality-inspired genital euphemisms.
and i just had a bowl of strawberry granola and soymilk and it was pretty tasty, but it’s sitting like lead in my stomach. and it’s saturday night and everyone else is out being social. but not me. i stayed in to get some work done. and one of my neigbors is listening to one of those contemporary singer-songwriter guys who are almost impossible to diferentiate from one another.
oh, that was bitchy of me.
oh, see, ‘bitch’, there’s another one. and since when is referring to someone as a female dog supposed to be an insult? personally i would only refer to someone as a female dog as a pretty exalted compliment. dogs are wonderful. so to be compared to a female dog should be a compliment, right?
kind of how ‘fucker’ is an insult. to imply that someone has an active sex life is an insult? that’s strange.
ok, back to work.
i’m surprised that there aren’t more widely used sexual euphemisms based on food. a penis looks like many different types of vegetable, certainly much more so than a rooster. and vaginas look much more like certain types of fruits and flowers (also reproductive organs, see georgia o’keefe for visual reference) than like a domesticated house-cat.
ok, now i’m really going back to work.
goodnight.
moby